The Usual Suspects meets Memento except you don't see it coming and it has good comic relief.
Showing posts with label movie reviews. Show all posts
Showing posts with label movie reviews. Show all posts
06 August 2020
01 August 2020
EUROVISION SONG CONTEST: The Story of Fire Saga
Wholesome version of Spinal Tap set in Iceland.
I laughed my ass off. Highly recommend.
Here, watch Volcano Man.
Gun Akimbo
Nerve with Harry Potter instead or Emma Roberts
Underdog internet troll forced to step up and find his inner superhero
14 June 2020
03 December 2018
The Craft (1996)
Magical Mean Girls.
Oldie, but still holds up. Soundtrack is now musak in supermarkets and CVS.
Oldie, but still holds up. Soundtrack is now musak in supermarkets and CVS.
13 March 2015
Better Living Through Chemistry
Unhappiness unravels as a series of fortunate events takes a straight edge pharmacist out of his head.
Sam Rockwell in the burbs.
Sam Rockwell in the burbs.
13 May 2014
Elysium
Good Will Hunting lifts weights in District 9 before making Contact with Jodi Foster channeling Jack Nicholson in a Few Good Men..
08 February 2014
Breaking Bad - the entire series
Moral grey zone. Explore how your exposure changes your way of thinking about things. Adapt or die.
29 November 2013
28 August 2013
Oblivion
Moon + Coma + The Matrix + The Borg + Terminator and the Hal 9000 thrown in for good measure.
Tom Cruise being every action hero he's been, except not Minority Report. This movie builds over the first hour and 12 minutes, desolate scenery, character building, world building, and you think, "Wow, this is gonna be amazing", and then it's not. I'm a big fan of sci-fi and action and I am more than willing to forgive giant holes and nods to other movies and actors phoning it in, but this was such a direct rip off of Moon with Time Machine and The Matrix jumbled in that it actually pissed me off. The last 45 minutes of the movie was a big rush to blow things up and then they pulled one of those M. Night "surprise!" deux ex machina dick moves and I ended up screaming at the screen and cursing the director, who as it happens, was also the writer, go figure. Seriously, this could have been a great sci-fi movie even with the ripping off of the other movies, but Hollywood needs to stop giving these guys carte blanche and they need to start putting money into training editors who edit scripts and the film itself. They need to stop letting these guys operate in either the vacuum or the echo chamber. It's like the author's of successful series who decide that they don't need an editor any more for publishing and every precious word or idea is a perfect flower. It's not. It's ego. And they need to check it at the gate and give us good writing again.
Tom Cruise being every action hero he's been, except not Minority Report. This movie builds over the first hour and 12 minutes, desolate scenery, character building, world building, and you think, "Wow, this is gonna be amazing", and then it's not. I'm a big fan of sci-fi and action and I am more than willing to forgive giant holes and nods to other movies and actors phoning it in, but this was such a direct rip off of Moon with Time Machine and The Matrix jumbled in that it actually pissed me off. The last 45 minutes of the movie was a big rush to blow things up and then they pulled one of those M. Night "surprise!" deux ex machina dick moves and I ended up screaming at the screen and cursing the director, who as it happens, was also the writer, go figure. Seriously, this could have been a great sci-fi movie even with the ripping off of the other movies, but Hollywood needs to stop giving these guys carte blanche and they need to start putting money into training editors who edit scripts and the film itself. They need to stop letting these guys operate in either the vacuum or the echo chamber. It's like the author's of successful series who decide that they don't need an editor any more for publishing and every precious word or idea is a perfect flower. It's not. It's ego. And they need to check it at the gate and give us good writing again.
21 August 2013
Blood Clan (Rabies or "Kalevet")
Their makeup artists aren't afraid of bone fragments.
Fear.net offering.
Israeli horror flick. Subtitles. Some krav maga. All the women have blue eyes...
19 August 2013
Chained
D'onofrio's Men in Black character drives a cab as cover for his secret life.
So, he and the director wanted to call this movie "Rabbit" which would have been a much better title. It built up and up and up and then it just stops. They ran out of money. So I was all into it being an 8 out of 10, but then it was a 6. Bummer. It coulda been a contender.
So, he and the director wanted to call this movie "Rabbit" which would have been a much better title. It built up and up and up and then it just stops. They ran out of money. So I was all into it being an 8 out of 10, but then it was a 6. Bummer. It coulda been a contender.
18 August 2013
Innocent Blood
French Vampire decides that the mob is wasting blood.
Set in Pittsburgh, uses all our favorites from every mob movie, including a few you wouldn't expect like Don Rickles. John Landis directed so you know there is comic relief.
Set in Pittsburgh, uses all our favorites from every mob movie, including a few you wouldn't expect like Don Rickles. John Landis directed so you know there is comic relief.
Byzantium
Secret vampire society, no girls allowed.
Retelling, can walk in daylight, no sparkles, everyone out to get them, etc.
Lovely costumes during the back story bits, bleak scenery of winter in the English seaside, love, loss, greed, redemption. I thought the ending a little too pat, as though they had an alternate but those crazy Americans in the test audience wanted a happy finish. Saoirse Ronin was amazing as usual. And I could watch Gemma Arterton in anything.
Retelling, can walk in daylight, no sparkles, everyone out to get them, etc.
Lovely costumes during the back story bits, bleak scenery of winter in the English seaside, love, loss, greed, redemption. I thought the ending a little too pat, as though they had an alternate but those crazy Americans in the test audience wanted a happy finish. Saoirse Ronin was amazing as usual. And I could watch Gemma Arterton in anything.
Europa Report
Ignoring people's paranoia gets everyone killed.
Well done science. NASA was a consultant and they used actual footage and it was beautiful and amazing and scary. Interesting premise, good cast, fantastic photography. There were holes in the plot/story, but there always are in movies. I want to watch this again.
Blood and Donuts
Vampire walks into a Donut Shop...
Typical 1980s camp. Big hair, mullets, heavy guitar riffs, 88 minute music video feel. Vampire tired of it all. The usual angst.
Typical 1980s camp. Big hair, mullets, heavy guitar riffs, 88 minute music video feel. Vampire tired of it all. The usual angst.
11 April 2013
P.S. I Love You
Poor man's Julia Roberts surrounded by fake Irish accents.
or
To Gillian on her 37th Birthday remake with roles reversed
This could have been a cute little tear-jerker flick but there is absolutely NO chemistry between Swank and any of the cast except Bates who plays her mom. This is coming from someone who likes bad romantic dramedies. I actually turned is off halfway thru because facebook was more entertaining.
or
To Gillian on her 37th Birthday remake with roles reversed
This could have been a cute little tear-jerker flick but there is absolutely NO chemistry between Swank and any of the cast except Bates who plays her mom. This is coming from someone who likes bad romantic dramedies. I actually turned is off halfway thru because facebook was more entertaining.
05 April 2013
John Carter
Too much CGI
or
actors talking to air
I'm all for sci-fi CGI in moderation, it's great to show vast spaces (though Hollywood used to paint amazing vistas and background using painters and set designers...) and things flying and to make monsters look massive, etc, but when it replaces people, so that the actors in the film are talking to air, when the actors aren't getting the feedback of the give and take of saying lines to another person, it is noticeable. The nuances of body language, inflections and tone get lost and make for a wooden film. The actual live sequences between real actors like Carter and the Princess are full of life, but when they turn to talk to the CGI, their eyes don't match up, their gestures are stilted, and their timing is off.
These are things that viewers notice mostly on an unconscious level, they may not realize that is why they aren't liking the movie. It's not that the acting is bad, per se, but that the CGI is.
or
actors talking to air
I'm all for sci-fi CGI in moderation, it's great to show vast spaces (though Hollywood used to paint amazing vistas and background using painters and set designers...) and things flying and to make monsters look massive, etc, but when it replaces people, so that the actors in the film are talking to air, when the actors aren't getting the feedback of the give and take of saying lines to another person, it is noticeable. The nuances of body language, inflections and tone get lost and make for a wooden film. The actual live sequences between real actors like Carter and the Princess are full of life, but when they turn to talk to the CGI, their eyes don't match up, their gestures are stilted, and their timing is off.
These are things that viewers notice mostly on an unconscious level, they may not realize that is why they aren't liking the movie. It's not that the acting is bad, per se, but that the CGI is.
02 April 2013
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